Saturday, August 26, 2006

Writer's Cramp

Really, I have no idea why I agreed to contribute to Eastcliff Richard's new publication The Isle of Thanet Gazunder. I've spent so much time typing, my right arm has gone to sleep.

The celebrity twit asked me if I would be interested in writing a regular column about crime and security. The last time I had anything to do with police work, the hunt was still on for Jack the Ripper. Oh well, anything to oblige.


At 11:42 am, Blogger sfdretywu said...

Just in case it hasn't already occured, masturbating with a 'dead hand' can lend the illusion that someone else is doing it for you!
If that's not your thing, you can always sit on your willy for a while (until it goes numb) and then operate under the illusion that you're doing it to someone else.
You may even want to sit on both your hand and your willy for the voyeur option.

At 10:56 am, Blogger The Angina Monologues said...

And for the ladies? How would they acquire a numb front bottom?

At 3:36 pm, Blogger sfdretywu said...

Give it a good kicking. A working knowledge of Yoga is useful for those with onanistic tendancies.

At 9:43 pm, Blogger The Angina Monologues said...

Maybe while they're fixing up my football sized hernia they could take out a rib or two?


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